Number 332

what's it like to have your fb wall flooded with wall posts from other people?

mine's really empty. only flooded with wall posts from myself.

that must be the consequence of not having a best friend. or maybe not being popular enough that people couldn't care less.

been looking at different walls. and theirs are all so flooded with posts from their friends, asking if they're okay, sharing bits and pieces of their lives and stuff.

when would that ever happen to my wall? i'd rather be flooded with spams than log into fb everyday hoping for something and nothing ever comes up.

ahh, the home econs presentation was today. it was great. :) and i'm not attached okay?! can't wait for the practical on monday. i think i'll end up cooking up a storm. hehe. green fried rice.

i just finished up my part for the science PBL. really helped me to revise the separation techniques. and makes me totally look forward to taking chem next year.

and i've totally decided on which subject combi i want already. awesomeness. chem, bio, pure geog, hist elec; here i come.

i've given up on trip science already. heh. looking at my results. sigh. only a miracle can turn things around. oh wells, i wouldn't want to take physics anyway. the dryness of it all would send me to sleep everytime the teacher steps into the classroom.

and Ms Thang TOTALLY discourages the class from taking physics. heh. and i'm so taking her advice. maths is so not my thing. i'd rather bio.

on the sidenote, i really wanna play my clarinet now. blow all the oxygen outta my brain. bite my lip till it bleeds and tongue until my tongue drops off. my thumb can go rot too. at least then i'll be too concentrated on working on my tone that i'll just forget about everything.

the perfect escape route.

or i could study and study and study. bring my notes and books and files along with me everywhere i go and just bury my head in it.

the awesome escape route.

or maybe. i could spend time waiting on the Lord. i bet doing that would take away the troubles forevermore. yes yes. i should. totally spend lotsa time waiting on the Lord as Matthew 6:33 says 'But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.'

the flawless plan.

i'm off to watch the Glee episode that i missed yesterday. i think i'm on my way to becoming a Gleek. woots. Carolyn Chow would be so happy.

27.08.2010

Number 331

heh. i feel like posting again, and i shall. HAHA.

i reallyyy miss CAC! awesome camp, awesome people, awesome worship. I truly experienced worship like never before. :D

and it was a great 3days out of the world and among people like me. being high all day with Kelly and Faith. HAHA. sprouting nonsense. especially on the last night. HAHA. super high. so now you see how i behave at school. hahaha.

forever so high. especially at band. :) band is awesome. and my clarinet is awesome. the clarinet section is awesome. :)

and i can't wait for the P4 leadership camp during the sept hols. haha. i'll totally go there and influence all the girls to go to Cedar. with Marilyn, of course. HAHA.

and i wanted to watch Glee just now, and i was online. heh. so i couldn't watch it. so i shall immediately go to xinmsn to watch it now. haha. while waiting for my video to be done. HAHA. the Lim brothers are so awesome.

and i have a feeling that i'm boosting their egos. oh gah. they'll have really big heads the next time i see them! HAHAHA. like some teacher i know of. HAHAHAHAHA.

yes. so i'm going to watch Glee now. :D :D awesome. HAHA.

26.08.2010

Number 330

I really love blogging. HAHA. but i think i'd rather write sometimes. hehe. i can't possibly be bringing my laptop with me all the time eh? and there's never wireless. gah.

so anyway, i'm super super indebted to Aaron. HAHA. awesome guy, i tell you.

okay, so it's like this. the stupid home econs presentation's tomorrow. and we've got a video to present. and then the video that Yuning passed to me was in another format that i couldn't use to edit! hehe. then it so happened that i was texting Aaron, so i was whining about it. HAHA.

hmm, then he offered to edit it for me. :) YAY. i'm so noob with editing videos and stuff. the only use of the computer for me is to go online and go to fb. HAHA. and maybe do a little homework lah. HAHAHAHAHA.

oh then cause the dumb video was SOOOO SOOOO BIG. i couldn't send it over email. and megaupload couldn't upload it. argh. and i stayed up till 1 plus. oh gah. oh yah. then today, he came to get the video from me. during band. HAHA.

super funny. cause i kept feeling my phone vibrate, then i couldn't answer it cause Ms Sia was watching me like a hawk. so then after quite some time there was this random Cedarian who suddenly came into the band room. and called me.

OHMYGOODNESS. i was super horrified. cause the WHOLE BAND was there. and then they were like LAUGHING! and Ms Sia thought it was my boy-friend. HAHA. yepyep. so i've just finished translating the video.

gah. the man just pisses me off. he was like MUMBLING! gosh. i was blasting the speakers and trying to figure out what he was trying to say. goodness. now i know. i shall speak slowly and clearly whenever somebody's recording a video of me. HAHA.

yesyes. so now i owe Aaron a really huge huge favour. hehe.

anyway, band prac was awesome. although it was really annoying that we had to do embouchure studies for like an hour. heh. then Singapore Rhapsody. gosh. i'd rather have played Persis. oh well, we have to rehearse for the Genting competition eh.

so yes. a load has been taken off my chest. HAHA. thanks to the ending of many projects that went on all at once. :) i don't even want to think about doing stupid reflections. haha. tying up the lose ends.

i think i'll just crap my way through the presentation, since i usually do that. HAHA. and my voice would usually be resounding in class, so i don't think people are actually listening, eh? cause i don't. it's totally pointless.

presentations are for the teachers to see what we've done. the only good thing about it is that is helps to build up confidence. HAHA. totally forces me to speak loudly! :D but not being high.

yes! and i better go buy my notebook. i have a HUGE UNSTOPPABLE urge to write! :D random stuff.

and JY Aaron/Caleb! whoever's doing the video for me! :D a million thanks :D :D

26.08.2010

Number 329

i just love staying up late trying to find a way to convert some stupid video so that i can edit it. yah right. i'd rather go to sleep now. but apparently i have to convert the video before being able to edit it. sigh.

and Aaron can't help! GAH. and the presentation's on friday. awesomeness. :S

and i should really be memorising my lines and the places where i come in for the lit performance. cause i'll feel very weird if i don't act properly in front on the class and Mr Sng, obviously. cause then he will totally fail us cause he's so darn strict.

GAH.

GAH.

GAH.

and i haven't translated it yet. shit shit shit. i'd better haul my laptop to school tomorrow so i can translate it.

OH WAIT. i haven't done maths. shit x100. i'd better do maths. copy. argh. sitting in front is never good. everything is out there for all to see. can all the bookworms please just volunteer yourselves to sit in front?

then people like me can escape to the back and rush homework for the next period. cause apparently i'm such a noob at such stuff i take a really long time to do it and end up with not enough time for proper homework.

oh man. i really should be looking for a solution to convert the video and try to memorise the lit thing. and it's seven minutes to tomorrow.

24.08.2010

Number 328

GAH. i totally love the word! HAHA. it's so awesome. it's like the f-word, only it's not! :D :D :D

anyway, lit performance is TOMORROW! oh gosh. and i'm going to show off my fat thighs to the world. i'm supposed to wear the Bougae cheer skirt?! and house tee. haha. the house tee is SUPER SUPER auntie.

and i can't seem to edit the video! i tried everything lah. gah! and the presentation's on friday. oh gosh oh gosh. i'm going to like faint on the spot. and i'll need the RCY people to wake me up. HAHA.

gah. another sec4 maths topic. it's so dumb. but it's good. shit lah. i can't even get proportion right and i'm supposed to do another sec4 topic. but learning ahead is still good. heh. more revision time in sec4.

lovely. Thank God the projects are all coming to an end. :) just tying up some loose ends. which is awesome. because after 2 terms of suffering, i'm finally released. to mug for exams. HAHA. i'd rather mug. than do projects. awesomeness.

the piano exam's coming! on 14sept. the tuesday after the sept holidays. which is good. so i can mug during the holidays. awesome. haha. and i wanna go for the P4 Leadership camp again this year! and I MUST GET MY CIP HOURS!. hahahahah.

i'm looking forward to lit period being over quickly tomorrow. gah. act 1 scene 5 is so so so long! and i appear THREE times. gah. moving in and out is so annoying. and i can't seem to remember my lines.

i really feel sad for Nadja, Joey and Shahfiqah and Emily, of course. jiayou tomorrow! haha. and Shamirah and i shall slack. HAHA. cause we have the least lines! with Sham having the least lah, obviously. that drunkard. :P

can't wait for teacher's day! :D then can go back to KHS.! and see awesome people. haha. and i think i grew fatter and a lil taller! gosh. i'm going to be the shorty. again. gah. nevermind. i'll just try to remember all their names lah. HAHA.

and i shall get a notebook. or a diary. whichever is cheaper. HAHA. i need to keep track of my thoughts and memories. then one day when i'm old and feeble, i'll take them out to read and remember all the awesome times i had with awesome people.

gah. i shouldn't be so much of a loner. i should be more high like when i'm in school! haha. i'm not even half as high when i'm in church. hehe. mostly just depressed cause there's school the next day. HAHA. i should totally be more high. but not annoying. yes. it shall be my goal. :D

and i should totally stop thinking that everyone has something against me. haha. maybe someone does lah, but i really hope it's not everyone. and i should use more sarcasm. sarcasm rocks. although it pisses some people off. HAHA.

and i shall listen to more Christian songs instead of mainstream pop songs. HAHA. later kenna brainwashed! arh, but i've got no songs! sigh. okay. haha. i shall make it my point to find more Christian songs. yes, i should. (:

and i really wish it's my birthday soon. then i'll wish that my wall's flooded. then i'll be really happy cause i know that someone actually remembers. :)

and i should totally start filing up my stuff and start studying. totally. especially maths. gah.

and i really really really love the song 'All For Love' by Hillsong.

24.08.2010

P.S. * i can't wait for band tomorrow! and i hope i don't sound so flat.!

All for love a Father gave
For only love could make a way
All for love the heavens cried
For love was crucified

Oh how many times have I broken Your heart
But still You forgive
If only I ask
And how many times have You heard me pray
Draw near to me

Everything I need is You
My beginning, my forever
Everything I need is You

Let me sing all for love
I will join the angel song
Ever holy is the Lord
King of Glory
King of all

Oh how many times have I broken Your heart
But still You forgive
If only I ask
And how many times have You heard me pray
Draw near to me

Everything I need is You
My beginning, my forever
Everything I need is You (x2)

All for a love a Saviour prayed
Abba Father have Your way
Though they know not what they do
Let the Cross draw man to You

Everything I need is You
My beginning, my forever
Everything I need is You (x2)

- All For Love - Hillsong

Number 327

ah, i feel weird today. i guess it's the mood swings and constant tiredness. gosh.

anyway, i managed to successfully piss my dad off. awesome. what an achievement. gah. and i managed to get some stuff outta my system. about time lah, i was about to explode anyway. and i have to thank my grandma for it.

so, the projects are about to come to an end. geog presentation tomorrow, and then i'll be done and over with it. hist's due tomorrow. science was finished up today. awesome. thank God!

the only ones left are home econs and lit. and i'm so dreading lit. acting?! totally not my thing. especially when it's Shakespeare. goodness.

i totally can't wait for the exams. cause then the projects will end and i'll be able to mug like crazy alone. without having to worry about the project deadlines. gah. and maths. i'll have to finish everything.

that's what the september holidays are for. mugging like crazy. and chinese listening's on T4W1. aiya. i really want to ace it.

heh. did pretty well for english oral. :) 32/40. awesome. and 34/40 for chinese. i bet it's cause the examiners were really lenient. hehe. but i got 10 outta 10 for english reading! :D :D :D

band today was crappy. after missing two band pracs in a row, my tongue has gone haywire and my fingers are really stiff. we can't do running notes properly! gosh. and we finally played Persis. i'm so happy.

although it wasn't good, i still liked it cause we were playing it as a band instead of the section being so extra playing the running notes without the melody.

ah, band yesterday was cancelled. cause of store check. hehe. met Aaron for lunch. and got all wet. my shoes were dripping water when i lifted it up lah! gosh. i felt so stupid. and i was totally wet.

talked for really long. hehe. haven't talked so much in so long. it's great blurting everything out. HAHA.

i need a friend. but not just any friend. an intimate friend. someone i can call anytime, tell them anything and they'll stand on my side. (: and i have one! well, but He theoretically doesn't stay on earth. haha. He's the coolest person ever. :D i feel so loved.

12.08.2010

Number 326

okay. so i'm falling in love with blogging all over again. hehe.

hmmm, i just realised today that i really love walking. cause i was walking from the bus stop to piano lesson, and i loved it. hehe. but i'll need my 'sian' face and my ipod and my slippers. HAHA. so awesome right.

anyway, went to parkway early in the morning today to do home econs. gah. i was early, and the rest of them were late. awesome. hehe. Shahfiqah was late by half an hour! my gosh.

anyway, went to short john to interview the hawker, but apparently it wasn't open yet. so we went to G8. thank God it was open. hehe. the fried rice was nice! really fragrant and yummy. but a tad too oily.

went with Shahfiqah to banquet to eat. heh. then went for piano lesson. gosh. it was great! i finally can play the song better! improved. :)

and i've been thinking. thinking is good. and i want to go for band! why must band be cancelled?! stupid store check. gah. i was hoping to have a self-prac session on wednesday! hmph. i want my clarinet!!!

and i just realised there are people reading! heh. surprised. so tags are not reliable in showing the number of people reading. gah! and school's tomorrow. heh. i am sooo not looking forward to school. and i haven't found somebody for lunch yet! hehe.

10.08.2010

tags! :D

swedha(:: tagging yet again
me: my gosh, Swedha. i totally love you! continue tagging kkay? i love it
when you tag. haha. i just feel like laughing!

Aaron!~: HmM...card tricks huh! obessed with watching them or actually
trying to perform them?
me: i don't know lah. hehe. i like watching them! performing it not my
thing cause my fingers are really short. gah!

Number 325

hmmm, i'm posting for the second time today. gah. i think it's cause i've got nothing much to do online. so i've been thinking. heh.

okay, so anyway, i was blog stalking my teacher. hehe. anyway, it's really well written. to a point where i was actually moved to tears. well, i didn't bawl my eyes out or anything, but there were the few stray tears that escaped my eyes.

so, i was thinking. i blog that is well written is really a joy to read. especially if it's thought provoking. and not so much descriptive of the process, but more reflective of the event.

and i've been thinking. alot. mostly about my turbulent feelings. hehe. i guess it's the plague of being a teen. the mind runs wild. and the imagination goes amok. and i feel like i'm dislocated from the world. haha. how awesome eh?

but what is it that we really want?

friendships. an awesome part. full of joy and heartbreak. making friends is difficult. totally unwanted. haha. i don't like it, at least. but once the friend is made, it's a wonderful journey :) from there, we learn what is having a crush like. haha. i like that part. the liking part. HAHA. i'm so weird.

but why do we like? so much confusion. and hidden agendas. i'm going to say i've got hidden motives for hanging out with some people too. sigh. it's just sad. and i feel like i'm getting obsessed. gah!

and i have to bring my focus back to God. He can fill up any empty hole that my heart contains. even the one that a 'boyfriend' is supposed to fill. haha. not that i wouldn't want a boy. hehe. it's so easy to stray, but so hard to come back.

like the Chinese proverb, '学坏三天，学好三年' or something along those lines.

gah. too many distractions. everything can be a distraction, ain't it?

so anyhow, i feel like i'm like a blur now. sifting through each day without actually feeling the day. like a day at school can feel like a dream and i feel as if i haven't learnt anything at all. each day is passing so fast and before i know it, it's sunday again.

i want focus. how i felt last year. like each day was something worth living for. feeling every single day to the core. remembering clearly what each day stood for.

the days now just fly past like i'm a being that's outside of the world. just watching the world go past, not actually participating in it.

Life is like a coin. You can spend it any way you wish, but you only spend it once.
Lillian Dickson

and i've got a new obsession. card tricks! HAHA. i just find them so cool. (:

09.08.2010

Number 324

i shall blog about sports day! HAHAHAHA. okay, so 31july2010 was sports day. and it was at yio chu kang stadium. SUPER FAR. my gosh. me and daddy had to leave the house at 6.30am and i still got there after 7am. thanks to the rain. -.-

anyway, so it was raining pretty bad that day. so we sorta tried to wait for the rain to stop before starting the events. and guess what. we had mass singing! it was super high. hehe. but the more we sang, the heavier it rained! my goodness.

i think it's partly our sucky voices. well, not everybody's in the choir. but it's not like everybody in choir can sing. hehe.

so, the meet was cancelled due to the pouring rain that never actually stopped. heh. so, after that the section, namely me, Jingwen, Shiree, Carolyn Ying, Choong Ying and Angie went to ikea at tampines to get Ongsia day presents.

so we made our way from the stadium THROUGH the heavy rain to the mrt station. and guess what. while we were walking, the stupid bus drove past us and splashed a whole lot of water at us! aiyo! the water went into my socks! gah! and my skirt was wet. -.-

so the mrt station was like SUPER SUPER packed. full of Cedarians! HAHA. anyway, so then we to the mrt to Bishan, then circle line to Paya Lebar and green line to Tampines. -.- very good. change mrt so many times!

so, we went to pizza hut at TM for lunch. HAHA. i bet we were the first customers there that day lah! nobody at all inside except for us. hehe. so, me and Jingwen ordered lasagna! :D :D :D finally! my gosh. then the rest ate pizza. wah.

then we took the shuttle bus to ikea. HAHA. so funny. anyway, we went there, and walked the wrong way towards the exit when we were supposed to be going up the escalator. *great sense of direction eh, Jingwen?* okay, so then we walked back and went up the escalator.

we went to the soft toy section! HAHA. we got the heart thingy with the hands for them. HAHA. then we went downstairs and got boxes for them. heh. then we went UP AGAIN to get the $0.90 soft toys for them too. to fill up the box.

we walked quite a few rounds around ikea for some reason i cannot fathom. ah well, i guess it's something that the section does. aiyo. so then we went BACK UP for meatballs! HAHA. then down again to catch the shuttle bus back to TM.

and apparently Victoria wanted Jingwen to help her look at something at TM. hehe. and then we went to toys r us. and we got balloons for them. HAHAH. so funny. cause it's SUPER lame! and Jingwen got one for herself. gah. i can't believe that girl.

ooh, we went to yamaha! Carolyn Ying and Shiree got their polishing cloths! :D yay! shiny clarinets! :D we went to popular too! hehe. and Carolyn Ying for her file refill thingy cause she didn't have enough! HAHAHAHAHA.

hmmm, then we left lah. haha. after going to the apple store to find something JW wanted. -.- we obviously didn't find it cause the store was like freaking small.

hmmm, so after that we left lah, cause there wasn't anything else to get for them. HAHA. me and Carolyn Ying took the mrt! :D haha. and i was going directly to Kallang Leisure to meet people! HAHA. then go to FOP aka Festival Of Praise!! :D :D :D

so, i had to carry one of the heart thingy. gah. so embarrassing! everybody on the mrt was looking at me! eeyer! err, then Carolyn got off at eunos leaving me on the train till i reached paya lebar. :S

took circle line to stadium. and met Aaron at paya lebar. aiyo, by the time i met him, i missed quite a few trains already cause it was packed to the brim lah! my gosh. so many people! then we were late. hehe. cause we were supposed to me at kallang leisure at 5. =.=

and thankfully he helped me carry the heart! yay! :D not so embarrassing. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

ate pastamania for dinner. gah. and i had it for dinner the day before. hmm, met new people. it was a blessed fellowship. haha. and i was wearing my house tee. did i mention?!

hmmm, then we went to the stadium. HAHA. i was falling asleep! i was sooo tired! goodness. FOP was awesome. especially Planetshakers. well, the sound wasn't that good cause everything was blasting. especially the bass. wah. super loud. like it was trying to bring down the house! HAHA.

but it was still awesome. Don Moen too, but he used a recording instead of playing with a band. gah. so disappointed. but i liked the violin part. hehe. sermon by Reverend Che Ann was good. and well, let's say i was a lil disappointed that Janelle and Kelly didn't go. cause then we'd get high together!

ohh, i saw Audrey and Isabel! HAHA.

aiyo, then it ended quite late, daddy was pissed cause he drove the car out to fetch me from dakota. haha. well, i'm still thankful for daddy coming to fetch me :) but even if daddy hadn't come to fetch me, i'd still have someone to walk me home lah! and i wouldn't be alone! cause my awesome Father's with me :D

so, this week's relatively slack. cause got long weekend again. HAHA. national day celebrations at school was okay. not good, but not that bad. but one thing. CAN SOMEONE TAKE NOTICE OF THE BOAND FOR ONCE?! we play so hard during national day and everybody just takes notice of the UGs cause their marching is so cool and all that.

the band has to get credit. we practice so much harder than the UGs. our tone not nice then the school say the band is lousy. and when our tone's good, nobody takes note. wah thanks. and when our beat is a little off, and you complain. what do you want from us?! seriously.

so, went for lunch with Aaron and Jingrong on friday. haha. ate mos. -.- cause everywhere else was crowded TTM. sunday was great! hehe. Jaslyn taught me maths. :D and we talked. like how the UGs in Cedar stalk their seniors and stuff. HAHA.

it's National Day today! :D ah, Singapore's 45! I LOVE SINGAPORE! :D :D and i pray that the Lord will continue to put His favour on Singapore, and we'll live in a place where it's really safe! and we'll continue to love each other, for without love, everything's nothing. (:
09.08.2010