Number 126

they expect me to do everything by myself.they never thought that i'm still just a little kid.hasn't it ever crossed their minds that i've still got alot to learn and getting me to do everything by myself isn't the solution?yes,i agree with the learn-it-myself method.but has it ever occured to them that i need help?and what if i really need help?when i turn to them,their experience doesn't help at all.my friend's experience aren't even enough for them to cook a packet of noodles for themselves!

why is it that when i need help,nobody ever seems to be around.my parents are too busy taking care of my two younger brothers,my friends are too busy and inexperienced plus i don't even have tuition teachers to ask.sometimes,i envy my peers who have tuition.when they have questions they don't know,they go home and ask their tuition teachers,as if they're there 24/7.and what about me?

my parents never seem to know the answer,my school teacher always asks us to try,but i don't even understand the question,how am i going to try?and my friends.they always say,"sure.i'll teach you how to do."and what do they ever do?they just "help me do the question".giving me the answer and leaving me stranded there with a question mark over my head.great.if this carries on,how am i going to get at least 258 for the psle????

i sometimes always envy children whose parents tell them that they should not do this.and the reason behind why they should not do that.the cause-and-effect method.i love it.and what do my parents do?they just tell me "don't do!"and when i try to ask them why,they just asked me to shut up.now i'll never know why.great.

during the holiday at tioman,i had a great teachers.the people there,my family.they always told me why i should not do that particular thing.that's why i now almost never share anything about my life at school other than when it's compulsory.

when i'm at school,maybe some friends see me at outgoing,love to talk and maybe abit emo.but once i'm at home,i completely clam up.i shut up totally.unless it's totally compulsory.i don't see the point of telling my family the things in school when they don't even care.

like the concert.i asked them to buy the tickets though it was $35.what i was thinking about wasn't the money,but the feeling.i wanted them to be proud of me.i was performing in the first ever outdoor concert held by the school.but when i told them about it,they rejected me flatly.they simply told me,"the tickets are too expensive.just call us after your performance,then we go and pick you up.".i mean,don't they ever feel proud of me?because if they do,they don't show it.and i need the support from them to motivate me to do better.talking alone ISN'T going to work for me.

anyways,thank you everybody,regardless of whether you are a kong hwaian or not,who bought tickets to the concert on friday.it's a full house.thanks!and if you wanna find me.haha.i'm gonna perform in the choir part of the programme.so yeah.support the choir!woohoo!

haha.anyways,i gtg.wanna go read winglin liao.bb! :)
15/7/2008